All the Bright Places

All the Bright Places - Jennifer Niven
'is today a good day to die?'

this is something i ask myself in the morning when i wake p. in third person when i'm trying to keep my yes open while mr. schroeder drones on and on. at the supper table as i'm passing the green beans. at night when i'm lying awake because my brain won't shut of due to all there is to think about.

'is today the day? and if not today — when?'
i'm incredibly upset right now because i wanted to like this book so much. i mean, i've been waiting for it since roughly august of 2014, but i wound up having to dnf at 28%.

honestly, this book just wasn't for me, or i wasn't for it, or something. i didn't actually mind the cutesy, quirky writing style with suicide involved (because, to me, [b:Looking for Alaska|99561|Looking for Alaska|John Green||919292] was sort of cutesy and quirky, albeit melancholic,) but the characters were irritating to me. part of me thinks that maybe i'm just too old for this book because, at 22, the idea of a boy creating a facebook just for me, googling me and reading all about my personal life, and more or less stalking me/cornering me is... unappealing - like, skin-crawlingly, nauseatingly unappealing.

violet is a popular princess type with a hidden basement of emotional depth, far too intelligent for her "friends" - ruthlessly (and unrealistically) mean girls who she thinks of as sluts/slutty, and says are only popular because they, and i quote, put out. finch is a weird, isolated boy who's a huge trouble maker and incredibly unpopular and yet he has, apparently, fucked half of their school. as an adult, both of these characters are boring, and insulting to a certain degree, but... if i were a teenager, i would probably like them, and i would probably eat this book up like candy.

the road trip concept is cute. the whole concept of this book is cute. but i am a grown, slightly cynical woman and i'm just annoyed by quirky, quotable, john greenesque teenagers. (not to mention, i think this author took a heavier hand with her john green inspiration than the summary is forthcoming about, but what do i know?)